Now that the summer gardening is about to start, let's go through the early spring gardening and see what we could do differently next year.
Spring Bulbs
Overall, this was very well planted. I had Daffodils, Tulips and Hyacinths all in different beds, and I like that idea a lot. Spring bulbs are only really good if there are a lot of them. The daffodils in the sidewalk bed are great, and I'm just imaging what they will be like in 5 years. I probably won't be here in 5 years, but whatever. The way they're planted was perfect. I love having them in those drifts. I tried to get all of them out of the front bed, but I missed about 5. I'm going to pull them and plant them in the fall. There's no real reason I need to plant more, but there's a good chance I will just plant another pack of daffodils in the fall. I'd like to get the Tete a Tete, to have some diversity of size and shape.
The Hyacinths are great, as always. I planted a lot of Grape Hyacinths in there, and they're fabulous. They seem to have a long time in which they look good, unlike the regular Hyacinths. I'll probably do more of those, because oh my god. There is a massive cluster in the corner closest to the door, so I can see them right now through the storm door. I'd like more, throughout, but these are fucking working it. The regular Hyacinths are doing great, overall. About a third came up kind of weak, and the flowers were pretty sparse. They're pretty nicely positioned throughout the bed, but of course we could always use more. They don't seem to multiply. I just love the fragrance, when I leave in the morning or get home at night, when I delay for a few seconds fumbling with my keys, I get that hit of perfume and I'm just so happy.
This morning, I was leaving the house... last night, I had decided I could cut the daffodils that were in the wrong bed, because they didn't look right there. Once I had them in a jar, I needed more, so I went out to cut some more, at like, 9 pm. So I had this lovely jar with daffodils that I was bringing in to work. (As I did this, and I was picturing that gorgeous bunch of flowers on my desk, I was thinking, what's the over-under on one of the girls walking by and leaning down to bring her nose into the bouquet in hopes of smelling the "daffodil fragrance?" It was like, 3 hours. Why would anyone think daffodils have a fragrance?) I stood there, in the very cool twill trench I can only wear 4 weeks a year, with my laptop on one shoulder, holding my mason jar full of daffodils I would put in the cup holder in my car to bring it to my desk. I was at the door, I could smell these amazing Hyacinths, and I was delayed because I was watching the birds. I had woken up an hour earlier by the birds singing outside my open window. Now, I was watching two cardinals. A male and female were doing this delightful kind of interaction on the seat of my raised bed. They would jump around, then get close to each other, and then touch their beaks together. Then they would coyly shy away, only to jump back a few seconds later for more passionate beak-ing. I was so moved, I felt the kind of excitement of the first time you kiss your first boyfriend, you're so nervous but there's so much promise and anticipation, and it's just so sweet I could die.
And then I remember my gorgeous tulips. Last night, I was watching them constantly. The first set of them had opened, and I finally saw these rich colors. I was so happy. All my spring bulbs were a huge success, and I'm so happy with the way I planted them (so the opposite of last year.) The Tulips were the clear winner. They were planted really nicely, there was the right density, and they were all going to bloom. They were heart breakingly beautiful. I kept going outside to look at them, because I was delighted with the way these colors seemed to change through the change in light as we got into dusk. Even when I went out to sneak a few more daffodils, I put on the crazy lights so I could see them.
At this point, I was full-on Disney princess. I was communing with the birds, holding a bouquet of freshly cut flowers, breathing in the lovely fragrance, just loving nature so hard.
When I walked around the corner, it took me several seconds to understand and fully take in the kind of atrocity I was seeing in front of me. I didn't see that color. Was I mistaken, did I dream that beautiful display? As I gained my bearing, I realized these tulips that were so staggering beautiful were now just stems. The blooms appeared to have been pulled off. initially I was in denial, but of course these was a murderous dear. I started to cry, no joke. Of course I then got in my car, and every tulip display I passed reminded me of this injustice. These strip malls have mediocre tulips, at best. Mine were worlds beyond this, and they were so swiftly stolen, not just from me, but from the 10 or 20 people who walk past it every day. Couldn't the deer have just traveled 10 miles to eat the tulips at the car dealership? And as I listened to Morning Edition, with stories about a 10 year old boy escaping Vietnam during the war only to enlist and go to Afghanistan, the pervasive racial injustice in US cities, the thousands killed by the earthquake in Nepal, I just cried and cried and kept thinking about my tulips. They interviewed US military forces who discovered the first concentration camps, and they described the inability to understand what they were seeing, the initial denial. That's how I felt about the Tulips. Drake is right, deer are cunts.
I was surprised they only ate some. They seemed to go for those that were furthest along. But there were a lot, and it's very likely he was just full, and thought, "I'll just come back tomorrow, with all my friends!" I hope they all get fucking shot. I'll help field dress those fuckers.
The ones they ate, the ones that were furthest along, were the farthest to the back, That's like, 5 feet away from the sidewalk, so it must have stepped into the bed. I could not see any footprints. They must prefer the ones that are in full bloom, they were not just going for the low hanging fruit. I don't know what to do about this. I do not want to spread deer repelent. I don't want to just smell rotting eggs instead of hyacinths. It's pitch dark during the time they did this atrocity, so I don't think I motion activated sprinkler would be effective. I'll find out tomorrow if they eat more. I'm thinking of turning on the flood lights, but I'm worried that will just help them find the tulips. I hope they all fucking die.
So what to do differently? I could spray deer repellent, I could get a motion activated sprinkler... I might call Mike McGrath. It's not like he hasn't talked about this, but it's a good story, I have all these FEELINGS and I think he would empathize.
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